Funnies

A test of faith
"I was listening to a chrisian radio and heard a lady call in. "pastor, i was born
blind, and i've been bling all my life. i dont mind so much being blind, but i have
some well meening friends who tell me if i had more faith i could be healed."
the radio pastor asked her, "tell me, do you carry one of those white canes?"
"yes i do," she answered. "then the next time someone tells you that, hit him
or her on the head and, say if you had more faith that wouldent hurt.


The fall
A man named jack was walking along a steep cliff one day when he acsidently
got to close to the edge and fell. on the way down he grabbed a branch, which
temporaraly stopped his fall. he looked down and to his horror saw that the drop
below him was more than 1000 feet, and he could not hang on to the branch

forever. so jack began yelling for help, hoping that someone passing by would hear
and lower a rope or do something. "help! help! is anyone up there? help!" jack yelled.
no one heard him. he was about to give up when he heard a voice, "jack, jack. can
you hear me?" "yes, yes! i can hear you. I'm down hear!" "i can see you jack. are
you all right?" "no! yes! but, who are you, and were are you?" i am the lord, jack.
i am everywhere." "the lord? you mean god?" "thats me." "oh, god, please help me!
i promise that if you get me down from here, i'll really be a good person. i'll go back
to church and serve you for the rest of my life." "eyes on the promises, jack. now,
heres what i want you to do. listen carefully." "i'll do any thing, lord. just tell me."
"ok. let go of the branch." "what?" "i said, let go of the branch. trust me. let go."
there was a long silence. finally jack yelled, "help! help! help! is there any one else
up there?"

There is nothing brilliant or outstanding in my record,
except perhaps this one thing.
I do the things I believe ought to be done.
And when I make up my mind to do a thing, I act.
Theodore